You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize