So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize
