Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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