I think my fart just growled at me.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Randomize
