my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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