How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
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