Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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