He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
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