last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize