I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
