Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Randomize
