maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Randomize
