She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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