have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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