I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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