Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
