I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
