GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize