I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
