it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
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