I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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