i think my mom watched the whole time
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
