I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Randomize
