I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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