I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
