whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
