windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Is Oprah even human
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize
