I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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