what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
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Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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