508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Randomize
