i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Randomize