I chose taco bell over sex...
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
25 Cringeworthy Below the Pants Injuries
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.