Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
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