That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
