well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Randomize
