Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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