if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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