his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
I think I just shit out all my problems.
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