And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize