...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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