Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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