He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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