There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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