the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
