Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Of course I have a pirate flag
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
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