i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
