this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
whose ass print is on the piano?
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
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