Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
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