In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
they're like a gay fantastic four
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize
