dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Randomize
