She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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