This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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